Mainlining Christmas

This was highly ranked on a list over at Rotten Tomatoes , so I decided to check it out. It's a Christmas war movie, which seems to be a fairly sparse sub-genre, especially when compared to the almost absurdly large Christmas action movie genre. It's a stark and fascinating film, at times sad, beautiful, and funny. It's got some issues which hold it back from being a bona fide classic, but it's still worth watching. The movie follows a unit of "whiz kid" soldiers in World War II who are sent to gather intelligence. When the movie opens, half of their unit is already dead and most of the rest are sick of combat. Every synopsis I've seen focuses on the movie's second act, when they have a series of bizarre encounters with a German squad culminating in a Christmas celebration. There's some good film making on display here. These scenes are tense, funny, and engaging. Gradually, we learn the Germans want to surrender, but there are some complicat

Sarah Palin's new book is, more or less, a long-winded, nonsensical rant from someone who has absolutely no idea what she's talking about. I'll pause to let the shock sink in. The book is largely driven by a pervasive misunderstanding of the war on Christmas, who's fighting it, and what it's over. In her worldview, those fighting Christmas are offended atheists who want to push Christ out of Christmas and replace it with a Solstice festival, ceremonies venerating sun gods, and even Islamic holidays. She doesn't mention push from Jewish households - both liberal and conservative - who are bothered by the holiday's status in schools, nor does she acknowledge the sizable numbers of conservative Christians who boycott the holiday because of its pagan roots. She seems to have at least a passing familiarity with those roots. There's a brief mention that Jesus probably wasn't born on 12/25, and that the holiday's date was likely co-opted from

Once you’ve seen one Christmas dramedy with a side of romance, you’ve seen… well, you’ve probably seen a horrible movie, but isn’t that why we’re here? To come together, in this joyous season, over the wonders and horrors that Christmas inspires in us all. Mostly horrors. Crazy for Christmas is a tv-movie about a single-mom limo-driver who gets a last-minute job on Christmas to drive an old rich guy around while he gives copious amounts of money to strangers and acts suspiciously excited about getting to know her. You already know he’s her dad, right? I mean, I knew from the first scene they had together. Erin thought maybe the guy was Santa. No such luck. Shannon (limo-driver) spends an hour and a half trying not to take the guy’s money and pitching awkwardly written emotional fits. I mean, they could have built a structure here where her reactions made sense, but no. She doesn’t trust him from the start, and then when he finally levels with her, she freaks out over something

The Ice Harvest Scott Phillips, 2000 Crossposted from The Blue Fairy’s Bookshelf Premise: Charlie Arglist is making the rounds on Christmas Eve, 1979: the bars he likes, the strip joint he runs and the one that he patronizes. He’s not telling anyone that he’s leaving town in the morning. Charlie’s not having a good night. I didn’t like the movie of this as much as Erin did, but I did really enjoy the book. It’s got a bleak humor that places it firmly in the best noir tradition. Charlie’s a lawyer, and he works in the machinery of the mob that runs much of the town, managing businesses like porn shops and the Tease-O-Rama. He’s skipping town in the morning. That’s all you know at the start of the book, and I really liked the slow build. The movie hits you right at the start with Charlie’s partnership with Vic, and why and how they plan to leave town, but for fully half of the book, all you know is that Charlie’s leaving, and he has to meet Vic at two. The book takes place ov

For a sub-genre that's not widely discussed, there is a hell of a lot of Christmas noir out there. The Ice Harvest is a long way from the best of the bunch, but it's an interesting flick. The movie stars John Cusack as a lawyer who makes lawyers look good. I haven't seen a lot of movies which make Cusack seem unlikable, but this manages. Fortunately, the movie doesn't hinge on his likability: he's a desperate and pitiful man in a desperate and pitiful world. The whole thing is set on Christmas Eve, right after Cusack's character (along with his partner, played by Billy Bob Thornton) steals two million dollars from his boss, a mobster who owns several strip clubs. He's played by Randy Quaid, who - along with Thornton - are fairly iconic Christmas movie actors at this point. The movie does several things right and a few wrong. I liked the visuals - the world depicted here is a pale blue; you almost get cold just watching the movie. The actors do a dece

The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy was a bizarre show. Not quite as bizarre as Courage the Cowardly Dog , but it seemed to be trying. It ran from 2001 to 2007 on Cartoon Network, which makes it a contemporary of some the network's best programming: Powerpuff Girls, Samurai Jack , and so on. I don't think Billy & Mandy reached those heights. The premise was kind of awesome, though: two kids essentially enslave death and force him to do their bidding. Billy is an idiot (though he usually has almost superhumanly good luck), and Mandy is a cruel, sadistic, and calculating child who routinely frightens Death himself. No one watched this show for Billy. It's been a while, but I seem to recall Mandy's power-level starting a lot higher than it was in this episode. If I'm remembering correctly, the original gag was that the monsters and demons they encountered were never as frightening or dangerous as Mandy. In this one... that wasn't really the case.

Ten Reasons to Celebrate Christmas 10. Technically, there's no real evidence Jesus wasn't born on December 25th. 9. In a pinch, glass bulbs make excellent projectiles. It's good to have them around, in case of home invasion. 8. Millions of trees are cut down every year as decorations. Trees are assholes. 7. Retail employees need at least one holiday off, now that they're all scheduled to work Thanksgiving. 6. To celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, Dionysus. 5. Irony. 4. It pisses off a lot of people who aren't Christian. 3. It REALLY pisses off a lot of people who are Christian. 2. Having a drying pine tree in your house for a month and half ensures you gets your money's worth from your fire insurance. 1. Presents.