Mainlining Christmas

I'd say this low-budget sci-fi/horror flick was surprisingly good, but the truth is I chose it among a list of other low-budget Christmas movies because it had an unusually good reputation. Despite having the hallmarks of a small production - contained setting, small cast, mostly shot in the dark - this one manages to deliver a solid survivalist horror movie. The caveat to that is Alien Raiders doesn't deliver anything on top of this: the movie is a good entry in the genre, but it's not subverting, advancing, or transforming that genre in any way. If you've seen movies like this before (and if you're watching something called Alien Raiders, you almost certainly have), you also know the plot beats, premise, and twists. I'm not trying to take anything away from this movie or what first-time director Ben Rock was able to accomplish. Low-budget horror flicks are dime-a-dozen, and they're almost never handled with anywhere near this level of skill. This practical...

30 Days of Night is a high-concept vampire survival movie with the gimmick of being set in a town so far north a single winter night lasts for thirty days. That last part is real, or at least real enough: the closer you get to the North Pole, the longer winter nights become (the North Pole itself has one night and one day a year, a detail I wish more movies about Santa would incorporate). The town where this is set is also real - it's the northernmost location in Alaska, now called Utqiagvik, though it went by Barrow in 2007 when this movie was made. I should note that 30 Days of Night never mentions Christmas, nor are there any major holiday decorations (there are some white string lights early on, but it's not clear whether these are meant to reference Christmas or simply decorative). In short, there's nothing in the dialogue or on screen suggesting this is set at or about Christmas in any way. So why am I talking about it? The answer, of course, is built into the premise...

This is, for better or worse (mostly worse), very much a product of its time, landing around the end of the X-Files, which this borrows from heavily. Elements also feel similar to Donnie Darko, though I'm skeptical this would have had the time or inclination to replicate anything about that film, which had bombed at the box office. Of course, all of this stuff is drawing inspiration from the work of David Lynch - some editing and effects choices in The Mothman Prophecies seem to be directly referencing Twin Peaks. Oh, and it's also based on a book I haven't read. The book purports to be non-fiction, with the caveat this stuff tends to strain the definition of that categorization. This is, after all, a story about extra-dimensional aliens prophesizing future catastrophes that cannot be prevented. Whether or not you believe that's possible, I assume anyone reading this is intelligent enough to have figured out by now the media built up around it is almost universally crea...

Lindsay and I wound up seeing this because our daughter has become fixated on Winne the Pooh. I believe we've now watched or re-watched all of the animated movies at least once; most more than that. Judging by her level of excitement while this was playing, I'm guessing we're going to watch this several more times, so I actually wanted to write it up before I become sick of the damn thing. "More sick" might be a more accurate description. Don't get me wrong: I'm a fan of the bear with very little brain and have been for a very long time. Hell, I used to wear a Winnie the Pooh pendant in college, and I'd take it out when asked about my religion. It was a joke, of course, but my affection for the character is genuine. I still love the original Disney shorts and the movie they were compiled into, and I was pleasantly surprised to find The Tigger Movie - something I'd last seen in theaters - holds up. The 2011 movie is pretty great, too. But as we'...

Even the title of this animated movie is difficult to unravel. This was a Finnish production, but it was animated in English before being released with several different titles, including at least two English titles depending on which country you were in. "The Flight Before Christmas" is the title for the US release, the far superior "Niko & The Way to the Stars" is the title in other English-speaking markets, and "Niko – Lentäjän poika" (which translates to something like, "Niko: Flier's Son") is the Finnish title. And, as far as I can tell, none of these are any more or less official than the others. Despite a strong preference for "The Way of the Stars," I'm going with the US title, since that's how this is primarily listed in the US. Adding complications, there are a few different versions of this floating around, because at some point this was also cut down to 45 minutes and shown on TV. For better or worse, we watc...

Okay, we'll start with the world's silliest spoiler warning, because this Christmas ghost story  technically  has a twist ending, but you probably already know what it is. No, really, regardless of whether you've even heard of this, without knowing the premise or anything about it aside from the fact it's got ghosts in it and it was made in 2003, the thing you're expecting is the thing it does, to the point I'm honestly unsure whether it was even intended as an actual twist, a meta-commentary on how common those became following the success of The Sixth Sense, or even a gimmick to ensure every single person in the audience gets an endorphin rush as their suspicions are confirmed. But, again, structurally the movie ends with a twist reveal and the bulk of the film is executed quite well, so... if you want to be surprised when it's revealed the near-collision at the start of the movie was actually a crash which killed all but one of the main characters, I reco...

For better or worse (or more accurately first for better then subsequently for worse) this 2009 movie written and directed by Richard Kelly (the Donnie Darko guy) based on the 1970 short story by the legendary Richard Matheson leaves you utterly perplexed as to what it is you're actually watching. "Button, Button" (the story it's adapted from) is fairly straightforward as far as these things go, based on the idea a box is dropped off containing a button which if pressed will result in a financial payout but also the death of someone the presser doesn't know. In the original story, the death was the husband of the woman who pressed the button (the loophole being she supposedly never really knew him); when this was adapted for the Twilight Zone series in the '80s, they altered the ending to instead imply the next recipient would be someone the previous holders didn't know. This... I mean.... Okay, spoiler warning, I guess. This isn't a movie I'll be ...

This is one of several movies I found on a BFI list of great Christmas movies of the 21st century . Like a few movies on that list, Moven Callar's holiday credentials are a tad dubious - I'd defend this as a Christmas movie, but it's a pretty close margin. What's less ambiguous is the quality. The movie is gorgeously shot, with a fantastic performance from Samantha Morton in a role conveyed largely through physicality. I don't quite agree with the assessment in the article linked above that she "barely says a word throughout the film," but it's notable that virtually nothing she says offers a hint as to why she's doing any of the things she does. The movie is exceptionally good, and those in the mood for something dark and meditative will find it a satisfying experience, provided they're not easily frustrated by narratives that are disinterested in explaining themselves. So, take all that into account before reading on, because - as usual - we...

FYI: This show is watched by our 4-year-old. Her feedback will be included in this review. WorldWorld is a PBS show (originally 2007-2011) that teaches preschoolers basic spelling and phonics along with some other positive messages. I've always found it generally amusing, although the in-world rules raise a lot of questions.  All the things, including the characters, are physically made up of the letters that spell their names. And if you can spell something, you can create it. For example, if you line up the letters H, A, T, you now have a hat. So it's a bit like the Star Trek question of why anything would be scarce in a world with replicators, but it's an exponentially larger issue here because the characters find letters basically anywhere (they don't seem to be a finite resource) and in several episodes, it's established that you can pluralize words to create infinite stuff.  Each half-hour episode includes two separate stories.   The Christmas Star This story...

Well, this one's going to be hard as hell to rate. On a technical level, The Children is an extremely impressive movie. It's well-shot with atmospheric visuals, effective jump scares, and a really unnerving premise. The central conceit, that children turn on adults, is executed so convincingly I'm honestly unsure whether to credit the film's editing or the performances of the young actors for selling the kids as terrifying, deadly, and remorseless. And if reading the last paragraph made you a little sick to your stomach, you may already have an inkling of the "but" coming up. Just because you can show something in a movie doesn't necessarily mean you should. I kind of feel like I just watched a new form of exploitation being invented. Okay, "new" is an overstatement, and not just because the actors playing The Children's young antagonists are now old enough they might have kids of their own. While the details of the premise have changed, the...

Bridget Jones's Diary appears on a fair number of lists of Christmas and New Year's movies, usually with the caveat that most of the movie doesn't take place on the holiday, which is probably why we glossed over it for as long as we did. But now that we're exploring less restrictive definitions of "Christmas movie," I thought it was time to give this a watch, which led to a couple surprising revelations. First, while only a fraction of the movie is set over the holidays, this would have applied under even our stricter criteria, as its thematic use of those celebrations (particularly New Year's) permeates the entire film. But second and more important is that this movie absolutely fucking rules. I'll be honest - I hadn't expected that. I'm not sure why I assumed it wouldn't, but I suspect it has something to do with the trailer (I just looked it up on YouTube, and it certainly isn't doing the movie any favors). But the film itself is hil...