Mainlining Christmas

Until I saw some online discussion surrounding this recently, I hadn't realized it was an adaptation of A Christmas Carol. I'd never seen the movie and have no memory of the trailers - if I ever thought about the movie, I must have assumed it was a fairly typical romantic comedy with supernatural elements. Hell, until we expanded our purview five or so years ago, we wouldn't have considered this worth reviewing the blog at all (it explicitly is not  set at Christmas). But the Dickens connection here is significant and worth exploring, and - for better and worse - this is an interesting movie. It's also surprising in a number of respects. This is a far more faithful retelling of A Christmas Carol than I'd ever have expected given the premise. It incorporates elements of the story and characters, mostly in clever and subtle ways (though I could have done without the "What day is it" callback gag near the end). That's the "better" side of the ...

Pinning this down to a genre - or even a short list of genres - is virtually impossible. The movie, for better and worse, plays like a barrage of ideas and imagery drawn from Ghostbusters, Blade, Marvel movies (Doctor Strange in particular), The Matrix, Men In Black, as well as more obscure fare - there's a surprising amount of The Frighteners in this. Meanwhile, the pacing feels like it's right out of a Michael Bay Transformers movie, which I promise is only 50% intended as an insult (Nekrotronic, for all its faults, is consistently interesting to look at, which is no small feat on a limited budget). If I had to try to classify this, I'd settle on action/adventure/comedy/horror/fantasy/superhero. More than any of that, this feels like a tongue-in-cheek two-decade-late adaptation of Mage: The Ascension (ask your parents to ask those weird people they knew in college). You'll note something was missing from that long line of genres: Christmas movie. And that's going ...

It's a bit reductive to describe this French horror movie as being about a killer advent calendar, but if anyone needs that for some kind of yuletide horror bingo card, by all means check it off. What I found most interesting about the film is its choice of subgenres and references to establish the rules and lore around the deadly box. I should caution those are minor spoilers, so read the next paragraph at your own risk. The movie's premise is ultimately revealed to be a mix of "deal-with-the-devil" and time travel elements, with the stipulation neither are explicit. The time travel, in particular, won't register as part of that subgenre to anyone who hasn't spent an abnormal amount of time considering that genre. As for the "deal-with-the-devil" thing... it's not entirely clear the monster at the center of this is a demon, at all. You could argue it's actually an angel, of the Old Testament variety. And Eva, the movie's heroine, doesn...

In general, I try to approach low and micro budget productions as gently as possible while still being honest. I understand these are working with resources orders of magnitude below the level of even small Hollywood movies, and many of these feel like labors of love being made to develop skills or just have fun. Comparing something like Two Front Teeth  with Nosferatu  would be like rating a pinewood derby car against a Formula 1 racing car: it's not even supposed to be the same thing. That why I usually refrain from being dismissive around movies like these. But handling these with kid gloves is contingent on the people making these putting in the effort to deliver the best movie possible given their circumstances. Pagan Warrior, a movie which features multiple typos in the text opening the movie, is not conducive to a feeling of goodwill. So, let's be frank: this is bad, and not in a way I found particularly interesting, though the premise is outlandish enough, your mileage...

You'll generally only see this marketed in the US under the title, "A Christmas Tale", which seems be an accurate translation, with the caveat "Cuento de Navidad" is also how "A Christmas Carol" is often translated into Spanish. The other part of the full title, "Películas para no dormir," is the series it's from, consisting of six Spanish TV horror movies originally airing in 2005. That's... actually the short  version: if I'm understanding right, they were sort of a revival for a television series called "Historias para no dormir" which was produced sporadically from the late 60s to early 80s, but let's just focus on what's at hand. I don't believe any of the other five films in the 2005 series were set at Christmas, though I'm tempted to watch to find out. Because "A Christmas Tale" (or whatever you want to call it) is absolutely phenomenal. There's no "graded on a curve" or ...

Snow Falls is a horror movie about five teenagers who are either being killed off by supernatural snow or just hallucinating due to hypothermia and hunger. The ambiguity surrounding what's causing their deterioration is intentional; the movie being bad is presumably less so. Okay, that was a little harsh. Snow Falls has some decent moments in it, and I need to hedge any criticism with the caveat I'm unclear how much this thing cost to put together (aside from "not very much", which is obvious). I do think it's important to consider budget when discussing movies like these, as well as what the movie was supposed to accomplish for the filmmakers. If they hoped to create something capable of attracting a following like that of  The Lodge , they were way off the mark. On the other hand, if this was produced for very  little money with the goal of displaying a competency with genre... I mean, it's still not a homerun, but there are a handful of good shots scattered...

Some of my least favorite reviews to write are low-budget, independent horror flicks. They're ambitious, they're low budget, they almost always have interesting premises, and - of course - they're almost always pretty bad. Silent Bite, a movie about a group of bank robbers who find themselves hiding out in a mostly abandoned hotel on Christmas Eve alongside a family of hungry vampire dominatrixes, is no exception. Despite some above-average performances and a couple unexpectedly good comedic sequences, the movie leaves you far more bored than you'd think possible given a 90-minute runtime and that premise.  I should note that I have only tidbits of information about this production. There's no Wikipedia page for the film, and a cursory internet search didn't reveal any in depth articles or interviews. This was made by a small production company that appears to specialize in this sort of thing. It was produced and written by Simon Phillips (who also plays one of ...

30 Days of Night is a high-concept vampire survival movie with the gimmick of being set in a town so far north a single winter night lasts for thirty days. That last part is real, or at least real enough: the closer you get to the North Pole, the longer winter nights become (the North Pole itself has one night and one day a year, a detail I wish more movies about Santa would incorporate). The town where this is set is also real - it's the northernmost location in Alaska, now called Utqiagvik, though it went by Barrow in 2007 when this movie was made. I should note that 30 Days of Night never mentions Christmas, nor are there any major holiday decorations (there are some white string lights early on, but it's not clear whether these are meant to reference Christmas or simply decorative). In short, there's nothing in the dialogue or on screen suggesting this is set at or about Christmas in any way. So why am I talking about it? The answer, of course, is built into the premise...

I always love stumbling across a Christmas movie while catching up on genre fare I missed. Is that weird? Most likely, but then so is this movie, so that's appropriate. I should acknowledge this is one of those times viewers of the film are likely going to be surprised to hear it described as a Christmas movie, as references to the season are relatively sparse. However, the timing is unambiguous and noted on multiple occasions - in fact, the movie goes out of its way a few times to keep Christmas present. There's no reason that Orlok's familiar needed to be captured in the Christmas market, for example, but the movie drops in that detail. The second half of the film is explicitly set during the holidays (possibly the 24th through 28th, though I'm making a few assumptions to get that specific), which is plenty to cement this as a Christmas movie, albeit a subtle one. Backing up, Nosferatu is a remake of F. W. Murnau's 1922 silent horror film, which in turn was an uno...