Mainlining Christmas

DCU Holiday Bash (1997) Dennis O’Neil, Walter Simonson, Sal Buscema, Jim Aparo, et. al. This is a pretty fun assortment of stories. First Lois tells a story about Superman’s early attempts at being a hero to a lonely guy on Christmas Eve. I thought the story about Highfather and Orion filling in for a department store Santa was surprisingly awesome. Denny O’Neil’s contribution is a little noir tale about Catwoman rescuing a woman and child who were targeted by mobsters. There’s a humor piece starring Etrigan, and a maybe-too-preachy piece about Green Lantern going after some punks who desecrated a synagogue. Flash shops for a gift for his girlfriend (Reprinted in DC Universe Christmas) and Alfred closes out the issue with a little wordless piece called “Just Another Night”. This is a really solid assortment, and a very enjoyable read. DC Universe Holiday Special (2010) Joey Cavalieri, Tony Bedard, Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning, et. al. This was much less interesting an iss

Hope you're in the mood for a little magical realism, because that's what I've got today. For those of you who haven't been following along, every day from December 1st through the 25th I'm providing a new piece of short genre fiction about Christmas Eve. By: Erin L. Snyder The weeks leading up to the last day I ever saw Walter were bizarre to begin with. Come to think of it, the decade leading up to that Christmas Eve was pretty bizarre. Walter has always been... odd. Hell, I started hanging out with him because I felt sorry for the guy. That was... eighth grade, I guess. I mean, I was never what you’d call ‘one of the cool kids,’ but people seemed to like me. I had friends back then, groups I belonged to; hell, even a girlfriend. Walter didn’t really have any of that. I mean, there were people he ate with at lunch, people he hung out with and all that, but he never really seemed to care about any of them. There wasn’t a lot he did care about. Certainly no

This is not one the best episodes of Bonkers, but it has moments of amusement. But then again, I liked Bonkers, and plenty of people just plain did not. I get it, it was a farcical comedy for the most part, and it was loosely based on the world of Who Framed Roger Rabbit while being entirely animated. But hey, I thought the show (about a toon who joins the human police force to help them deal with toon crimes) was cute and had promise. I’ll admit this Christmas episode was pretty weak, though. Santa has a malfunction testing a new sleigh, and ends up at Fall-Apart Rabbit’s home with some amnesia. Fall-Apart takes his new friend “Jim” on some unseasonal adventures, which mostly seemed there to kill time with bad jokes. Meanwhile, some elves show up at the police station to enlist their help in tracking down the missing Santa. Bonkers takes on the case (though he doesn’t seem to get very far), while the elves try to get his partner, Lucky, to train to be a Santa stand-in in case they

The Madagascar Penguins In A Christmas Caper (2005) I didn’t hate this. It wasn’t amazing (and seems to have mixed up the Central Park Zoo and the Bronx Zoo) but I laughed a few times. The dimmest little penguin decides to go out after a last minute gift for a lonely polar bear, and the others have to mobilize to rescue him from an elderly lady who’s mistaken him for a plush toy. The woman is a bit of a hideous stereotype, with her vicious yippy dog and her unrelenting grumpiness and her claustrophobic Manhattan apartment. However, I thought the action was amusing, and it wasn’t long enough to really overstay its welcome. Your mileage may vary. Erin thought Merry Madagascar was better than this one, and I very much disagree. Either way, though, I think you can safely skip it. Shrek: Donkey's Caroling Christmas-tacular (2010) Apparently this started life as a DVD extra, but has since been repackaged to round out the collection of Dreamworks specials appearing on Netflix

Christmas in Tattertown is a rather bizarre piece. Originally intended as a pilot for an animated series, it's basically a love letter from Ralph Bakshi to the largely forgotten animated works of the early 1900's. It's got a lot of issues, but it's a fascinating piece on its own. In my opinion, it's a shame it was never picked up. The special is intentionally light on plot, but what's present follows a human teleported into a world inhabited by thrown out toys and other discarded objects. She sets out to teach the denizens of this new world about Christmas and eventually to celebrate. Meanwhile, the primary villain (the main character's doll), quickly assembles a criminal empire and attempts to take over Tattertown. I like that, by and large, characters don't play to type: in other words, a Christmas wreath is as likely to be a conman as anything else. It leads to some entertaining interactions, while adding depth to what could easily have been a t

Holy crud-muffins. I thought I vaguely remembered this show, and a lot more came back to me as I watched, but I had forgotten just how utterly insane it is. If you were not a Nicktoons watcher in the 90’s, you might have missed this one. It’s about Rocko, a wallaby who moves to the city with his dog Spunky, and his friends (a neurotic turtle-thing and a big dumb cow raised by wolves) and his enemies (the catfish-thing that lives down the street). It’s sometimes satirical, often subtly adult, and sometimes just gross-out. It wasn’t as biting or as gross as something like Ren and Stimpy, though. In this episode, Rocko’s feeling down about being on his own for the holidays, so he invites his friends over. A game of telephone later, and the whole town’s invited to a party, along with some magic Christmas elves that moved in across the street. Of course, professional jerkass Mr. Bighead gets involved, and it looks like Rocko will be alone for Christmas after all, until his new friend th

It's the 18th day of 25 Christmas Eves, my attempt to provide you with 25 genre stories about Christmas Eve. Today, you're getting a very short piece called "Slouching." Give it a read: By: Erin L. Snyder “I’ve been saying it, Bob. Been saying it for six years now. Ever since I moved into Elbington.” The ground shakes the tiniest bit, like a trailer’s driving by. But you look down one side of Route 81 and up the other, and there’s not a blessed thing. Not a headlight to your left or a tail light to your right. And you know perfectly well there’s not another road east of Milford can hold a truck with more than two axles. “Told Trev just last week up at Jones’ General Store, when he was all, ‘Merry CHRIST-mas.’ I told Trev he was wasting his breath. That there wouldn’t be a merry anything this go-round.” It’s silent for a second, then you hear the rustling. You step off of Stanley’s porch to have a look around. There’s nothing for a second, but the rustl