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The Christmas Quest (2024)

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I don't expect we'll watch a lot of Hallmark movies this season (nothing against the company; we just have too much else on our plate), but The Christmas Quest promised a premise too interesting to pass up. The gimmick this time was to fuse the usual romantic comedy with a National Treasure/Romancing the Stone/Indiana Jones style fantasy/adventure treasure hunt set in Iceland based loosely on folklore surrounding the Yule Lads (a group of Icelandic trolls who have become somewhat analogous to Santa as their more monstrous aspects became subdued over the centuries). That's certainly the kind of thing that gets our attention. Sadly, the premise turned out to be much more interesting than the movie itself. As is often the case with Hallmark productions, the genre elements wind up feeling superficial: they drop in a handful of casual references, but when push comes to shove this is a Hallmark Christmas flick to the core. There's no real danger, no suspense, no excitement......

Book Review: It's a Fabulous Life

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Book Review: It's a Fabulous Life Kelly Farmer, 2023 This year, I'm looking at a handful of interesting retellings of holiday classics. Here's an obvious one.  Premise: It's a Wonderful Life, but cheap-Netflix-remake ready.  I've often been a bit of a cynic when it comes to It's a Wonderful Life, and this book didn't cure me of that.  To me it reads like a romance novel full of very standard modern-romance-movie tropes - Girl lives in small town, but wants to move to the city. Girl's high school crush moves back to town and they reconnect. Both get roped into helping with a town holiday festival. Minor drama as girl can't decide whether to stay in town with first love or strike out for dream life in city. Magic of Christmas makes girl appreciate her life in town and decide to stay with first love. The fact that both girl and first love are female just makes it a modern romance, not an untraditional one.  And actually, that part of it is fine. Sweet,...

The Princess Bride (1987)

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Like most people of my generation, I’ve seen this movie many, many times. I was eight when this came out, and I’m pretty sure my family saw it on the big screen. We’d go on to rent it and eventually tape it off the TV. As an adult, it was one of those movies Lindsay and I considered essential – I don’t recall when we bought it on DVD, but we’ve had a copy for ages. But eventually the DVD just didn’t seem good enough, so I picked up the Criterion blu-ray in a recent sale. That was the version we introduced our own daughter to, and the quality, as you’d expect, was fantastic. It’s so good, you can clearly see the Christmas tree behind the mother as she talks to Fred Savage. Likewise, there’s no mistaking the winter landscape or holiday decorations on the next-door house outside his bedroom window. I’d long been aware there was a paper Santa in his room, but on its own this doesn’t necessarily indicate the season (crafts tend to stick around, after all). But along with the other stuff, it...

That Christmas (2024)

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If That Christmas had been released a decade ago, it would probably have performed modestly at the box office, sold well on DVD, gone into circulation on television and streaming, and be on its way to becoming a holiday classic. It's not reinventing the wheel, but it's the right mix of sweet, funny, and somber that makes for a fantastic experience that stays with you. This is really good stuff, with inspired voice casting and beautiful animation. But this wasn't made a decade ago, nor was it made five years ago, when the Disney/Fox merger threw production and release plans into disarray. So, here we are in 2024, when it's become pretty common for things like this to get picked up by Netflix and subsequently forgotten. Critics aren't enthusiastic about this one, either, so it's unlikely this will get much of a boost during awards season. Hell, we'll be lucky if this ever gets a blu-ray release (though if it does you can bet your ass I'll be buying a copy)...

Toy Review: Fresh Monkey Fiction Naughty or Nice, Wave 2: Father Frost

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To recap, I've been looking at several figures from the second wave of Fresh Monkey Fiction's "Naughty or Nice" action figures. Today, I'll be talking about the figure I was most excited about: Father Frost. Does it live up to the hype? Read the rest of the review to find out!  Wait. I hate when reviews pull that shit. The answer is, "mostly." The figure's pretty goddamn great, with a couple minor caveats. First, let's talk a little about who this guy is. Father Frost is a Russian midwinter figure best known to American audiences as the inspiration behind the Winter Warlock in the Rankin/Bass special, Santa Claus is Coming to Town , though the Russian film, Morozko , features a much more authentic version of the character. Both takes on the character seem to get nods in the accessories of this version, though it's fundamentally a new spin on the character. As you'd expect, the figure's body (and several of his accessories) are reused ...

R.M.N. (2022)

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Well, I've got a new favorite Romanian Christmas movie. And before you roll your eyes, let me remind you that actually means something  - for whatever reason the nation has produced some extremely good holiday films. I've got no idea what else exists that hasn't gotten attention over here, of course, but the three that made their way to the States all packed a punch. Also, all three have featured faltering romantic partnerships as plot elements - no idea what's up with that trend, either. That's about where comparisons end between R.M.N. and the other two, however. Actually, comparisons should probably end a bit earlier, as even that's a tenuous connection: the male lead in R.M.N. has a very different relationship with both his wife and mistress than those presented in the films I linked to. Before we get into the actual story, I do want to caution this is a movie best experienced spoiler-free, and - in case that whole "new favorite Romanian Christmas movi...

The Cheaters (1945)

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The Cheaters is the one of two movies featured in the revised edition of Jeremy Arnold's book, Christmas in the Movies, that I'd never seen, so I figured I'd better rectify the oversight. While I wasn't as smitten with the film as Arnold, there's no denying it's charming, largely thanks to the performances of Joseph Schildkraut (who also appears in the more famous The Shop Around the Corner), Billie Burke (Glinda, from The Wizard of Oz), and Eugene Pallette. That said, "charming" isn't the same as "satisfying." Palette plays James Pigeon, an upper-class businessman confronting money troubles who's just learned a distant relative has passed away about a week before Christmas. Said relative has left his sizable estate to an actress who he doesn't even know (he was a friend of the girl's mother). If said actress isn't identified within a week, the fortune will instead go to James. In an attempt to ensure this occurs, the fami...