Mainlining Christmas

I've never heard of a hymnalogue before, but apparently back in the stupid ages, these were sing-a-long video recordings with words superimposed over them. I had an opportunity to subject myself to a pair of these, one for "O Little Town of Bethlehem" and the other for "O Come All Ye Faithful." To call these uninspired feels like an understatement. These are black holes in which inspiration is sucked then never seen again. They're vapid, boring, and pointless videos. Hey, geniuses in the 50's: you know what the advantage is of video? That it allows things to MOVE. So, next time, why not recording something that isn't standing still. Just a thought. The audio recordings weren't bad, but neither were they impressive. Just generic, uninteresting versions of the songs. Don't believe me? Have a look for yourself. I can't find a video of Bethlehem, but here's O Come All Ye Faithful, for your viewing "enjoyment."

I've never seen this movie before this year, despite the parallels in tone with this blog. Going in, I was aware the movie was based on the theory that having Billy Bob Thornton drinking and swearing while wearing a Santa suit would somehow equal comedy gold. That they somehow managed to prove this theory is kind of amazing. This thing is very well made and does a good job knowing precisely how far it can go without actually crossing the wrong line. The movie wants to create the illusion it has no limits or sense of decency, but that's not the case. The lead character never really does anyone any actual harm (well, at least not where we have to see the consequences), which prevents the audience from having to confront any dark truths, save the requisite criticism of consumerism. I'm no fan of gross-out humor (in fact, it repulses me), but nothing in here bothered me. I remember seeing the trailers and thinking this would be a dark comedy, but it isn't; not really.

I've been listening to a lot of Christmas music recently, and reflecting on the difficulty of The Twelve Days of Christmas . It's a long song, and while it can be fun to sing counting songs like this one, it can be dreadfully boring to listen to them. Hence why most successful recorded versions of 12 Days include jokes, asides, or other little tricks to keep your interest. I'm going to provide a bunch of decent versions of the song below, let's see if I can get to Twelve. 1: The Muppets and John Denver Here you can see some classic tricks: different voices on each verse, some humorous asides, including Fozzie forgetting his lyrics. They actually redid this version almost moment for moment with Jimmy Fallon a few years ago, but the internet does not seem to want to provide me with the video of that. 2: Straight No Chaser This a cappella group does a really fun medley mashing up 12 Days with a ton of other holiday and non-holiday tunes. The hu

I know I've seen this eight minute short from Fleischer Studios before. It's relatively simple in concept: a bunch of orphans' Christmas is ruined until Grampy (one of Fleischer's reoccurring characters) breaks into their kitchen, transforms a bunch of stuff into toys, then disguises himself as Santa Claus to hand out the gifts. It's a simple concept, but the execution was ahead of its time. Like Grampy, Fleischer Studios invented some tricks of their own. Half a century before computer effects, they were developing innovative methods to create the illusion of 3D environments, as evidenced in the opening shot. Like most old cartoons, if you're not interested in animation and its history, you won't find much to like here. If, however, you appreciate the art form, this is a great piece.

I remembered this one from my childhood and wanted to track it down. It might be my favorite Christmas Carol I've seen yet this year, but it's a very odd one. This is actually an animated remake of a live action musical version (also a TV special) from 1956. It's full of songs and music; there's actually very little dialogue. I really like the music, although bear in mind the style has a lot in common with old-fashioned movie musicals. Some of the songs are wonderfully surreal. Near the start, Erin asked me to confirm that we'd just heard a bunch of alley cats singing about how Scrooge was so stingy that Satan was going to complain about him in Hell. Yes, yes we had. They manage to fit digressions about both Santa Claus and Jesus into an hour-long Christmas Carol, so there are a few common scenes missing from this adaptation. Nothing about young Scrooge at school, and if you blink you'll miss the Ghost of Christmas Future. I like the voice acting most

We're not the only ones in the holiday spirit. This week, The Man Your Man Could Smell Like (spokesperson/actor/action hero Isaiah Mustafa) is giving away 7 billion holiday gifts on Youtube. Click here:  http://www.youtube.com/oldspice#p/p for the full playlists with each day's announcements. Here's a sampling: Russia, Switzerland, Billings Montana, women named Lorraine and Matt Lauer also already have their gifts. Do you? You're Welcome.

Note the year of release - this isn't the famous Rankin/Bass stop-motion special, but rather a short directed by Max Fleischer. It's only about 8 minutes long, and it's an earlier adaptation of the song. I've known for a while that there were multiple versions of Rudolph out there, but somehow I missed that this was directed by Fleischer. If you're not a big fan of animation, he's the guy responsible for the Popeye cartoons, as well as the extremely influential Superman animated shorts. His take on Rudolph is, if nothing else, extremely bizarre. The story starts with Rudolph shunned for his nose by his peers, as you'd expect. What I didn't expect was the level of anthropomorphism used. These Reindeer walk upright, live in houses, and speak. The coach's whistle in the Rankin/Bass special seems realistic in comparison. In fact, Santa's the only human in the short. He comes across Rudolph when he's dropping off gifts in his town then enl